Romance 101
by mysupermanwillcome
Summary: With many failed attempts to transfer into a vampire, Troy had to turn to the subject he knew absolutely nothing about. TxG oneshot.


**Inspiration for this story:**

**Sage: Bunny, how do you be romantic?**

**Me: I don't know. Why?**

**Sage: Ok, never mind. **

**And that's how Romance 101 was conceived so this is dedicated to my friend Sage, even though I don't think he would be caught dead reading High School Musical fanfics. He's just too cool for that. Cough cough. **

**How are you! I haven't been on in awhile. How was everyone's Christmas and New Year? I hope you got spoiled! Tell me all about it!**

**Dear Santa readers: I know it's not Christmas time but I might do one last chapter, of Troy when he's 17 or so just to conclude the story. Yay or nay? (Neigh? Ney?)**

**Disclaimer: Ahehehehehe I own nothing! **

The door burst open and a gust of wind blew in. You could feel the humid wind seep into the already foggy room. A sweaty man with shaggy brown hair and light, blueberry eyes puffed his way across the room, dodging various objects being thrown around. He looked at his target with fear in his eyes.

"I need your help!" he said frantically.

The dark-skinned male with bushy hair piled on the top of his head looked at the brown haired boy alarmingly but then put a reassuring hand on the nervous looking boy's shoulder. "What's wrong?"

The boy with brown hair looked wildly from side to side, making no one was in listening range other than his bushy haired friend, before he explained his dilemma. Shock drained into the bushy haired man's face.

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The rules of brotherhood are quite simple; bros before 'hos, never date your friend's sister and bros to the end. So Chad Danforth had no choice but to help Troy Bolton when Troy sought his best friend's help.

"How do you be romantic?"

Chad stared at Troy for awhile, shock clearly dominant in his current emotions.

"You take her clothes off for her so she doesn't have to waste time doing it." He said jokingly, before bouncing the orange ball in his hands and shooting it into the hoop. _Swish_

"Be serious!" Troy exclaimed. "I need your help!"

"Why the hell would you wanna know that anyway?" Chad asked.

"Are you going to help me or not?" Troy asked worriedly, avoiding the question.

"Troy, you know I'd help you with anything. But romance? Why don't you leave that to Romeo or something?"

"Please Chad, I don't know where else to go." Troy pleaded. One look at Troy's desperate blue eyes and Chad knew he couldn't deny that he had to help his best friend. Bros to the end.

"Fine."

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On the Christmas tree of life, Gabriella Montez was the Christmas tree lights. She was cheerful, colourful, very easy on the eyes and brightened up the room. So it was no surprise that she caught the eye of a handful of guys, one, awkwardly enough, one of her best friends Troy Bolton. But like any teenage girl, she had a very protective wall surrounding her that responded to the names Taylor McKessie and Sharpay Evans. On the Christmas tree of life, Taylor was the branches and trunk. She kept everyone together, like their rock. Sharpay was the star placed at the top of the tree. Centre of attention, top of the tree. But she wasn't just any plain old star; she was imported from Milan, was encrusted with rubies, amethysts and diamonds and was shiny enough that you could see your reflection. Troy would do anything to be with Gabriella but according to the wall, no one was good enough for Gabriella, only Romeo and Edward Cullen. With many failed attempts to transfer into a vampire, Troy had to turn to the subject he knew absolutely nothing about.

Romance.

Feeling like he was in a gigantic maze with no map, he turned to the path labeled 'Danforth'. Though he didn't know Chad could be so over the top.

In the Danforth's living room, Troy was vaguely reminded of a university lecture room. A desk and some chairs were set up and directly in front of them was a white board with "Romance 101" headed up at the top. Chad stood by the white board in a navy blue suit, holding a pointer and a whiteboard marker and a proud look colouring his face. Troy took a seat at the desk with a notepad and pencil in his hand.

"Today we will be going over 3 topics. Appearances. Gifts. And Etiquette." He wrote all 3 down on the board and then stared at Troy.

"Oh, right!" Troy said, then scribbled them down into the notepad.

"I will be teaching appearances." Chad said once satisfied with Troy's note-taking.

"Who will be doing the others?" Troy asked.

"You will raise your hand before speaking!" Chad scolded.

"Sorry Ms. Darbus." Troy muttered under his breath before raising his hand.

"Yes Mr. Bolton?" Chad asked.

"Who will be doing the other 2 topics?"

"Ahhh, time will tell. I'll be then pulling out the _big guns_."

Troy gasped. "The _big guns_?" Chad smirked and nodded.

"Well will be going into appearances last, etiquette first which will be followed by gifts," Chad continued. "Any questions?"

Troy raised his hand. "Why do we need to go over appearances?"

Chad paused, shocked at why anyone would ask such a question. "Did Romeo go to marry Juliet with his boots scuffed or his tights ripped? Did Jack Dawson tell Rose to '_never let go_' with his shirt un-buttoned?-"

Troy tried to interrupt that he probably did but Chad rattled on.

"Did Edward VIII give up his throne for Wallis Simpson with his crown unpolished? Would Pocahontas have fallen for John Smith's good looks if he did not have the clothes to accentuate his good looks? Did Edward Cullen dazzle Bella Swan in clothes _out of a bin_?! _That_ is why we need to go over appearances. Anything else?"

"How did you grow an afro?" Chad groaned in reply.

"It's time for the _big guns_." Chad announced. There was a knock on Chad's front door. Chad's little sister Amelia could be heard opening the door. Footsteps tapped on the polished wooden floor, heading towards the living room. Footsteps from patent leather shoes.

-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-

Ryan Evans wasn't always Ryan Evans. Sometimes he was 'Sparkly Boy' or 'Sharpay's Shadow' or 'The Poodle.' But Ryan liked to call himself East High's Cupid. If he could, he would wear a nappy and take archery lessons. People didn't know that the person they liked started taking an interest in them because Ryan had convinced them to. Troy didn't know that the scrawny boy who loved nothing more than a good dance number and a hat to go with it was a common reason why East High had so many couples. Troy didn't know that the scrawny boy loved nothing more than seeing young, high school love.

And that's why Troy didn't know that the scrawny boy sporting a tight white pants, a lime green hat and black, very shiny patent leather shoes was the '_big guns_' Chad was talking about.

"Ryan Evans is the '_big guns_'?" Troy asked, not believing it. Ryan was anything but big.

"Yeah…who did you think I was talking about?" Chad asked.

"William Shakespeare." Troy admitted, blushing a tiny on his cheeks. Chad stared at him.

"Why would I get William Shakespeare?" Chad asked, wondering what went on in his best friend's head.

"Because he's the one who created Romeo, who I'm trying to be like." Troy said quietly.

"So you think I would scour the Earth looking for his rotting, long dead body, bring him back to life with a wave of my magic wand and take him here on my magic carpet to teach you how to win Gabriella's heart?"

"Well, you could always fly on a plane with him." He pointed out.

Ryan put his head in his hands. He had a lot of work to do. He went to join Chad by the whiteboard.

"Class-" Ryan announced.

Troy looked around. What a big class, he thought sarcastically.

"-my name is Ryan Evans and I will be teaching you about etiquette and what gifts you should give a girl.

"When around a girl, you always open the door for her, pull out her chair for her to sit down in. You address her as ma'am, madam or Miss." Ryan stated. Troy scribbled these down.

"You must NEVER talk about spiders, socks, gas of any kind or sports. These are boring to girls." Troy wanted to object, knowing a couple of girls who talked about nothing other than sports but decided against it.

"Don't leave any awkward pauses," Ryan continued. "As this will make you want to blurt out something embarrassing, blowing the whole fragrance of love out the window. When strolling with her, hold out your arm for her to loop with her own if she feels like it. Ask her about the weather and the future. Compliment her as much as you can.

"Never act stupid around her, or like you don't know what she's talking about. If she asks you a question and you don't know the answer, turn it back on her. Ask 'what do you think it is?' so she doesn't suspect you don't know."

Troy nodded, quickly jotting these down. This was _gold_.

"Never let her carry anything herself. Always carry her books, bag, lunch tray, pet Chihuahua, or sweater for her. Troy do you write poetry?" Ryan asked.

"Uh no." he replied. Ryan stared in disbelief.

"Am I the only one wanting this to work? I want you to write a romantic poem for her. At the very least a romantic letter. Girls love that." Troy nodded and noted that down. Poetry? He got a D in English on his last report.

"Good. Do you have any questions before we move onto gifts?" Troy shook his head. Chad raised his hand.

"About the sports mentioning-"

"I think you mean the non sports mentioning!" Ryan exclaimed.

"-why can't we mention sports?" Chad asked.

"Girls don't want to talk about sports!" Ryan insisted. "They want to talk about shopping and their nails and hot celebrity guys." That didn't sound like Gabriella but Troy just nodded and wrote that down.

"OK next topic; gifts. Basically I will go over what to and not to give her and how to present the gift.

"You mustn't give her chocolates. That's a common mistake; women don't want gifts that add to their thighs. Don't give her tacky $1 cards from the dairy either. Or money, that's just thoughtless.

"You can give girls flowers, jewelry and scrapbooks you have made with all the memories you two have had together, made from the love of your heart." Ryan said dramatically. Chad snorted quietly.

"When giving gifts, make it look at pretty and well thought of as you can. Wrap them up with lots of ribbon, and don't get the paper wrapping paper. Get that foil stuff. When presenting, tell her it's just a token of your love to her. Get down on one knee and hold it above to her. Do you have any questions Troy?" Ryan asked.

"Nope. I think I have everything." Troy said, skimming over his notes.

Ryan nodded. "Good. Well that ends my session. I will hand this over to Chad." Ryan stepped back as Chad stepped towards Troy.

"Troy, your previous question as to why we have to go over appearances made me wonder how much you know about this sort of stuff. Which is why I will be picking out your clothes myself. I can't have people think that I'm a bad teacher by what you wear!" Chad exclaimed.

"Um sure. Whatever floats your boat, teach." Troy said.

"I will go and pick out your clothes. I want you to go over your notes, write Gabriella's letter, find her a suitable gift and report here tomorrow morning at 0630 hours. You are dismissed."

Ryan patted Troy's shoulder. "Good luck. I'll be cheering for you." And he left, leaving a strange, sweet scent in the room.

"What's that smell?" Troy asked, sniffing the air.

"I think it's Ryan's cologne. Eau de Glitter." Chad snorted. "Now bugger off and write Gabriella a really romantic letter!" he said, shooing Troy out of his house.

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"I'm not wearing that." Troy said. And nothing would make him change his mind.

"Yes you are."

""No I'm not."

"Yes. You are!"

"No. I'm not!"

"Yes. _You_. Are!" Clenched teeth response, not a good sign.

"I'll look like a boring college professor who has thick framed glasses and thinks a social life is weekly chess games with his grandma!"

"No, you will look like a romantic gentleman who will woo Gabriella and sweep her off her Latina feet!" Chad insisted.

"I'm not wearing that." Troy repeated.

"Do you want to go out with Gabriella or not?" Troy huffed, grabbed the clothes and went into Chad's bathroom to change. It was 0636, not a good time for Troy to be up.

When Troy returned a couple minutes later, his frown was even more distinguished. Chad had picked out brown pants that came just above his ankles, a matching brown suit jacket, a pale yellow button up shirt and a purple tie.

Chad gasped and put his hands to his mouth. "My boy is growing up!"

Troy looked in Chad's full length mirror. "You know, I don't look as bad as I thought I would."

"That's the spirit!"

"I look worse." Troy said strongly.

"What are you talking about? Gabriella will have a hard time keeping her hands off of you!" Chad exclaimed.

"Really?" Troy asked hopefully.

"Of course! Now my mum's making pancakes, let's go!"

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It was 8:00am, just 40 more minutes to kill before class started and Troy was determined to kill it with Gabriella. Probably wasn't best to say it like that but Troy was to nervous to rephrase. Gas. What if he mentioned gas? Gabriella would be completely grossed out with him and would ran away warning everything girl to do the same. He shook his head, trying to calm himself down. Clutching a bouquet of white roses and an envelope containing his letter, he stalked over to Gabriella who was searching for something in her locker.

Gabriella was beautiful, to say in the very least. She had long, dark, naturally curly hair that she usually left hanging past her shoulders. Her eyes, dark brown, always portrayed her emotions and shone in the lights. Her style was simple and sweet; she liked knee length skirts or well fitting jeans that showed her petite frame and flowy tops.

"Hello Madam." He said in a deep voice. Gabriella giggled, thinking he must be joking about calling her Madam in the 21st century.

"Hey Troy, what's up?" she asked, not turning around to look at him.

"I'm fine." He said. She finally turned around and gasped at his fashion choice, then trying to stifle more giggles.

"Um nice pants. Are they new?" she asked, trying not to be mean about the horrendous pants.

Troy thought. Were they new? They were Chad's so he didn't know. And what was he supposed to do when he didn't know an answer?

"What do you think?" he asked seriously. Gabriella paused.

"Um, I don't know. Hey who are the flowers for?" she asked trying to change the subject.

"Oh, right." Troy dropped down to one knee. "These are for you." He held them up to her and bowed his head. Gabriella blushed.

"Troy, please get up. People are wondering if you're proposing or something." She urged him, referring to the loud whispers in the hallway.

"Not until you take the flowers, ma'am." Troy said. Gabriella quickly took the roses and pulled him up by his sleeve.

"Thank you." She said quietly before sneezing.

"No problem. Why is your nose red?" Troy asked.

"I'm allergic to flowers. But it's the thought that counts." She said, not wanting to seem ungrateful. Troy did a mental head-smack. He knew that. She had sneezed like a rabbit in a pepper factory when he had brought her to Science Club's secret spot on the rooftop.

"I apologize profusely for my thoughtlessness. Please forgive me ma'am." Troy said.

"Only if you stop calling me ma'am." Gabriella gave a little smile.

Compliment her as much as you can, Ryan's voice ran through his thoughts.

"Of course Madam. Might I say, you look beautiful today. That top makes your eyes sparkle like the stars in the country sky." Troy said cheesily. Gabriella's cheeks tinted red.

"Thanks." She mumbled.

Troy handed her the envelope. "This is just a token of my feelings for you."

Gabriella took the envelope from his hand and ripped it open. She pulled a silver package out. Troy had wrapped the letter in shiny silver foil wrapping paper.

Strange, she thought. She unwrapped it and opened the folded piece of paper that was inside.

_Dear Miss Gabriella,_

_This is just a token of my feelings for you._

_Your presence brightens up my life like a firefly in a jar  
__I love the way your eyes twinkle like a star  
I feel like I'm drowning when I am not with you,__  
You are the water ring to my poor swimming.__  
You are definitely the most beautiful girl in the world  
And I am blessed to have you in my life.  
When I am not with you  
I have a frown that needs to be turned upside down,  
Only you can put a smile on my dial.  
You are my sun, my moon and my meteor._

_Love always, Troy_

Gabriella looked up, shocked that something could be so sweet yet so incredibly cheesy. "Wow. That's really sweet Troy. Thank you."

"You're welcome. Will you care to come with me for a stroll, Madam?" Troy was holding out his arm, offering it to her. Gabriella looped her arm through his and smiled up at him.

"Oh, let me take that!" Troy exclaimed, grabbing her bag, large supply of books and flowers. His arms were completely full, he almost couldn't see in front of him.

"Are you sure? I'm fine holding them myself." Gabriella said.

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine." Troy insisted. Gabriella looked at him uncertainly but knew how stubborn he could get and decided to leave it.

"So, how's basketball?" Gabriella asked.

Never talk about sports, Ryan's voice popped into his head again.

"The weather is quite nice today, don't you think? So, what do you think about the future?" Troy asked her, steering her off the basketball comment.

"Um yeah the weather is good today. And I guess I'll know about the future when it comes. Are you alright Troy? You're not acting like yourself." Gabriella asked.

"Oh yes, I'm quite alright Miss." Troy assured her.

"What happened to my best friend?" Gabriella asked.

"I don't think I understand your question." Troy replied.

"What happened to my best friend who addressed me as Gabby and wore normal clothes. My best friend who once he started talking about basketball, he wouldn't stop. My best friend who hates talking about the future and doesn't put wrapping paper on his letters and talks normally. My best friend who I like. What happened to him Troy?" Gabriella asked. It had only been 20 minutes of the strange Troy and she couldn't take it.

"Maybe he took romance lessons from his friends so he would know how to ask you out?" Troy said.

Gabriella glanced at Troy with big eyes. "Really?"

Troy nodded and looked down before taking a deep breath, looking up at Gabriella with hopeful eyes that were awwwww-worthy. "Will you go out with me?"

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Troy plonked down on his bed. Life was good. No, life was better than good. It was uber good. It was fantastical good. He sighed.

After Gabriella had nodded eagerly to his question she reached up to kiss him, taking him by surprise. This caused the very graceful move of dropping Gabriella's books. Troy couldn't care less about the books. Though Gabriella quickly picked them up, making sure no harm was done to her precious books before she launched into him with another kiss.

Troy's cellphone beside him vibrated.

_1 New Txt_

_From: Sharpay_

_She's your meteor? Pssht what did you do, take lessons from Ryan? _

**I'm not to sure about the second half bit, but I didn't know how to write it. So you got stuck with that. Lucky you. **

**I tried to make Troy's letter cheesy but I didn't like it. That was as cheesy as I can get on a headache. **

**Uh please review, they make my day. They always put a smile on my face. And I'll try to reply to all of them! **

**Lots and lots and lots of love, Bunny **


End file.
